Green Mom

Being the mother of these four little kids (ages seven, four, two, and eight months) sure helps me remember the things that matter most...

Yes, yes, I sure do remember those things that matter most... BECAUSE THEY ARE THE THINGS I NEVER DO!!!

You know, those things at the bottom of Maslow's pyramid... I don't do any of those things these days. I don't do the eating, or sleeping, or getting dressed, or exercising, or taking a shower, or going outside. 

The good news is, I'm very Eco-friendly now.

I don't ever eat out, so I use less plastic, packaging, and energy.

In fact, my diet of leftover peanut butter and jelly crusts and half eaten string cheese has reduced landfill waste by 300 pounds this year.

I don't sleep at night which makes me SO empathetic to the plight of endangered nocturnal animals like the Blue Sided Tree Frog, New Zealand Kiwi Bird, and Wooly Flying Squirrel. I'm TOTALLY donating Garrit's next paycheck to the NWF.

I don't shower, so I use WAY less water! And I don't have time to drink water! Sometimes I even forget to brush my teeth, so, WOW! I am good at saving water!

I frequently fall asleep in my clothes, and then I wander around the house in the same grubby t-shirt and leggings for days. Just think of all the water I am saving by like NEVER washing my clothes!

I seldom bathe my children or wash their clothes either! Boy oh boy I am GREAT at saving water!

I don't go to the gym so I am saving TONS of energy. I don't need a gym because, well, I am always sweating as I try to wrestle the scissors and knives out of my children's hands. 

And I NEVER leave the house. I'm always here because someone is always taking a nap... And it's always NOT me!

I am so Eco-friendly I might actually LITERALLY be turning green. 

Aren't you proud?

...

But seriously, it's crazy around here. I miss the things that matter most...